Monday, January 18, 2010

How Many of Us Have Them?

Back in high school I rolled about 15 deep. Anywhere we went there was at least 10 of us. On rare occasions you would see a solo-dolo, but that's how we rolled. Over the years, some relationships had ran its course and people started trickling of your MySpace Top Friends (that was such a big deal then). Sure its life, but we all must admit to being naive at times.

Some girls pursued college and careers while others chose settling down and the family life. A handful of us still keep in close contact with each other and remain close. However, there was never any closure or answers to the whats and whys of our "cliques" friendships. We all thought for sure that BFF meant exactly "Best Friends Forever". No you don't have to call me everyday, but if I haven't heard from you in a month and I attempt to call you, I do expect and answer or a call back to say the least. After many attempts, I quit. I felt as if I made the effort to stay a "friend" to you and was totally ignored. I had no more questions because after so long I had already had my answers. No matter what they would've told me, I wouldn't have believed it.
My answers were one of the friendships were solely based on my relationship with someones sibling. So, when that relationship ended as did the friendship. The problem with that is that it doesn't satisfy the end of the others. Well, my answer to that is others not walking in their own line. Just following the trends. The trend being: ending all relationships with people who aren't "Saved". What-Thee-Fuck-Ever.

I've heard many rumors (i use that term loosely) as to why, like the ever so nice "We don't have anything in common anymore." Like the only thing we had in common was screwing everyone on every campus in Louisiana (they did that, I had a bf. lol), staying out all night, and fighting with random hoes. Speaks measures on your life, right? Grant it that I have kept in touch with a select few, I appreciate everyone who has given effort to continue on the relationships we had.

Disassociating yourself from toxic friends and family is extremely healthy. You should never end a relationship on pure bullshit. Nor should you decide to end a relationship with another without their knowledge. They have the right to know your reason. If they hurt you it should be pertinent for them to know so they can fix. You should always walk away from a situation feeling and knowing that you did everything you could possibly to do fix it. End it amicably. Follow the first Law of Nature: Self Preservation.Put yourself and your feelings first in all relationships. If its not right for you now, it probably wont be right for you later. And if you happen to end up in the other side of the rope, don't blame yourself. If they don't love you now, they didn't love you to begin with and they wont love you in to the end.

I'm sure I'll piss many off with the post- Like I care. Can we talk now? Nawl. You don't even have to acknowledge me when you see me. I chose to let go many relationships recently, choosing to handle some in a different way. Deleting people out of your phonebook, Facebook, Myspace, etc is one thing, but deleting them out of your memory is another. I can manage both.

2 comments:

Sunshyne said...

They will find you on Facebook and act all excited to have found you, but only talk to you through picture comments and fb chat. What's that about? *rolleyes*

mRZ. NuTurnz said...

wow Lady Complex, just when i think i've heard it all you seem to come back harder!!! please keep bustin dees heads open, and yours truly will bring the mop to clean up the mess. real talk..you will go far!