Elle, Oh Elle: Take the Poll

In the wake of acronyms being used in every conversation inside of an inbox, the LOLs, OMGs, and POWs have drowned my ears and now my eyes. Not only have people started using these in verbal conversations, they have found a way to use as "branding" for themselves. And where else did I go to witness these monstrousities? InDMix.com

Since, I am the Social Bitterfly International, I normally get my "social fix" through this uber popular club website, although I can only take viewing in doses. Sometimes I can only take one link a day, frankly it's too much at one damn time. My pupils begin to burn after being tortured by a plethora of American Apparel, Michael Jordans, lacefronts and blue contacts. No shade to the photographers, for they are there to give proof to how cunty and outright wrong some of you are. Depends on what parties you want to bare witness to, you may find a few gems in the bunch. But, that's here nor there. Lately, I've been peeping flicks of men, donning garments reading "OMG..." , and another shirtless man with glasses that have "POW" etched in cursive on each lens.  *Reverts to Shallow, Mean Girl *

Seriously tho?

Am I missing something?

Did someone not CC me on the memo?

 Who makes this okay- for men?

Isn't there sort of informal "Man Law" where men should not use smileys at the end of their texts, tweets, facebook statuses?

Can we add to that "Probihits the use of POW!, Owww, OMG"?

I need answers.

I would never want to question anyone's manhood, I know my place. Some men should definitely question their lifestyle and furthur more, their existance. Just when I thought I had enough with men wearing 12 chains at one time (they neck be itching), this shit here comes along. But, someone else has to see that something is wrong with this. As a female I cant say that your friends didn't try to stop you cause some mofo's are so adamant about looking like a plum fool than trying to heed good advice. I've just learned that some people love to be whack. That's what they live for. Being "different" has come to be what's normal in and what was the norm is somewhat odd. I may not be so fashion forward now, but I damn sure know what is WRONG.  Fuck that, I'll stay normal.

Throw me on the "Hater Bus".  Like I care. Matter of fact, just do us a favor and add yourself to the bottom of my "Don't Give a Fuck" list. Coin me the Queen of Subliminal Messages cause I could've posted pics, but I'm not photoshop savvy. Anyhow, I gave you all the directions to find these coof-a-boofs.  Plus, I'm not to big on throwing THAT much shade. It's bad enough there is a rapper that shuns women based on how "cheap" her shoes are. Questionable, no? I mean, how do you know my shirt came from Forever 21? I only grant those priviledges to the men who play on my team *Snaps*

People play with their life and my emotions to much. Chile, Boom.

Kat Scratch Fever, Choyclate Drops, Blogs & Burnt Skin

So, I've been sick with a sinus infection for the last week and on top of that, I had an episode of heat rash all over my abdomen and back. It's all my fault tho, I jumped my dumb ass head first into the tanning bed, 3 days in a row. Over exposure like a biatch. But anywho, I just want to rant with you for a moment.

Over the weekend, or through the week (can't really remember since I've doped up on cold meds and drenched in calamine lotion), along came a trick named Kat Stacks on twitter, claiming to have smashed the homies. The said homies are none other than some no name brand cats, Lil' Twist in particular, who is only 15 (I believe), and says that the "castmates" of Young Money are nothing but roommates that sleep in bunkbeds. You may ask, if Kat Snatch indeed hit that (Lil' Twist), who are the people condoning her pedophiliac antics? Plenny heauxs. If you haven't seen her youtube, let me suggest you grab a Rosetta Stone: Heauxshit Speak, but I'd rather send you over to my choyclate drop Kid Fury's for his repsonse to Kat Scratching Post. However, her antics are not my problem. She is claiming to have gotten a book deal out of her scandolous sexcapades. Uh, what? Superhead did this like 5 years ago, Carmen Bryan tried and failed successfully, and I'm sure there are plenty other jezebels running around with your favorite rapper's jizz on her belly, but those broads know better (not really). Who cares who you slept with? The best part(s) of her story is that she LIED. But good to know there is a woman who will give any willing her loose parts for cab fare and $1200.

It's no secret that out of all of this, ultimately I'm trying to get publishing as soon as I finish my book. Blogging is an added "equity" to my writing. It challenges me to write more on different topics as to one topic which would be the subject of the book. Not to mention it helps me introduce myself to more viewers. I made a comment on twitter the other day that said, "I wish writer type bloggers got the attention the gossip-type bloggers recieved". No shade to gossip bloggers, lawd knows I need them like water. There are so many bloggers who write about dope shit and gets no accolades. It takes my "New Post" tweet to be RT'd 37 times before I get ONE click. It's not that my work isnt quality, it's because most people would probably rather compare their lives to a celebrity, than a working class human being. It's cool though, I know that my words will reach someone and actually mean something.

This post may not make sense, or even mean anything to y'all, but hell, I had some things to say. But, my question is: who is this "literary agent" that lurks on twitter, offering such book deals? Send them my way. Thanks.

The Beautiful Tragedy: Confinement

"It had to be the worst day of my life. It was her second day of the two day life span the hospice nurse gave her. She was in a state of comatose and most importantly, I knew she was extremely uncomfortable in the current situation. Even though she could no longer speak, she would only communicate with me and I knew she heard everything that went on.

Everyone was literally at each others throat. A huge fight broke out outside of grandmother's house the night before. It was in-laws against blood. Grandmother no longer wanted daddy's and his family at her house to visit mom. What grandmother denied was how much her in-laws loved her. It was an unconditional love that she could not give to her own daughter. She had a sharp bitterness for everyone that gave her the kind of love she longed for. Dad was just the opposite, but one in the same. He justified the damage he caused her with his unconditional love. Everyone from dad to my brother and sister, and her mom and sisters where carrying so much guilt for either abusing or abandoning her at her worst times, they all were fighting to be there til her last breath. But, they were going about it selfishly.

I was playing the fence. I wanted to give everyone the chance to pay their respects I wanted peace for mom. I wanted to give her all she desired until it was over. But, at the moment it was so hard, I couldn't do anything. It was like everyone turned against me. All of my aunts, my dad, my brother and sister, were all pointing the finger at me for everything. I couldn't understand if I was the only one being selfless, what am i doing wrong?

For twelve hours, me and mom sat in the living room at her mothers house, being watched like we were in prison. I didnt eat, brush my teeth, drink anything the whole day. We just sat there, looking at each other, me praying, gazing into her eyes as she would gaze into mine. I made my decision, I whispered in her ear, "I have a surpirse for you today. If you can just hold on a little longer, I'm going to take you on a trip." She looked at me and gave me the deepest sigh of relief.

The ambulance ride was tough. I was afraid that it was too much for her already fragile body. We were only blocks away from our destination. I can still see the fright in her eyes and face. I talked to her and ran my fingers through her hair, saying "We're almost there!! You're doing so good!!" I could tell she was fighting so hard to stay with me."

Lady Complex Radio Debut

This past Sunday, I finally got my shit together and debuted Lady Complex Radio! I dedicated the segment to all female EVERYTHING! Any business savvy woman who has been driving themselves to accomplish a goal in whatever it is they are doing were welcome to call in and promote their brand. I did this specifically to support women like me who have trouble networking with other women due to fear of competition. I don't compete with anyone, so helping someone even in the same genre as me means nothing and is helping me sow good seeds.

However, Blog Talk Radio had plans to not let me be great, but I overcame. My switchboard had disappeared on my computer screen and it took for what seemed the whole hour segment to reappear. As much as I wanted to give up, I had some great Twitter friends who helped me through!! At one point, I said, "just let me ger one person on the line." And that's all I got! I spoke with Dawn from http://www.divadishtalk.com/ and she was awesome! I tweet with her a lot through the week, but hearing her voice and her speak on why she started blogging was inspirational. Dawn said she started with an internship to a popular gossip blog and was inspired to have her own after DJ AM's mother made the statement, "Find something you love to do and do it for free and then people will start paying you for it." That gave me chills!!

Unfortunately, I had more callers on hold to speak to and couldnt due to the technical difficulties that I will tend to with BTR. I had the ladies send me all their information to post. If you havent connected with any of these women, please do...they are all awesome in my book!!

http://www.divadishtalk.com/, ran by Dawn of Memphis, TN, is a celebrity entertainment blog and has recently featured an interview with Antonia (Toya) Carter of BET's hit reality series "Tiny & Toya". Follow @DivaDishTalk on twitter.

http://www.butilovememore.com/, an inspirational life changing blog written by author,  motivational speaker and Canadian native Nova Browning Rutherford, out of Los Angeles. Features life experiences and motivational stories. @butilovememore

http://www.embraceurlife.blogspot.com/, on www.BlogTalkRadio.com/embraceliferadio, is a weekly radio show (Wednesday's @ 8p) that impacts and empowers peers ages 19-34 hosted by Tiffani Walker out of Chicago, IL.  follow @embraceurlife on twitter.

Her Shoe Fetish, a Tupelo, MS shoe store female owned and operated , check http://www.her-fetish.com/.  follow @mzhershoefetish

Here are a few women I follow on Twitter that I have high hopes for and their brand!

@queenrosa has a cookbook you can purchase on http://www.divadishes.com/ and also get free recipes to seduce the love in your life.
@minxhouston the first Medical Nail Technician, offering the hottest nail couture to date, clientelle consists of Mya, Keri Hilson, Trina and LeToya Luckett.
@empressmag, an internet magazine that caters to the lifestyle of the inner empresses. I also contribute monthly to http://www.empressmag.com/.
@orig_glamazon write under the blog http://www.theglamchronicles.blogspot.com/, a highly intelligent woman who talks about everything from life, love and politics.
@caresslepore is a fashion blogger out of the ATL, that bases her themes on Disney movies and fashion icons. http://www.dafashionist.onsugar.com/
@luxurymoondust, whom I have come to love on twitter, a very candid and witty blogger on http://www.fcktheword.blogspot.com/
@whymelawd an awesome writer who's office stories are hilarious, yet true. http://www.happyaboutthis.com/
@marikai, who serves as VP to the Straight Girls for Amber Rose movement, http://www.black-american-princess-interrupted.blogspot.com/.

If you are not already, please follow these lovely ladies!! There is a little something out there for all of us!!  And despite the issues with BTR on Sunday, I can not wait for the next broadcast!!

You are all officially Ladies of Complex!!!

-If I missed your link, please post it in the comment section or send me an email so you can get a free feature on my next BTR show!!

You'll Get More Bee's With Honey

I really wanted title this "You'll Get More Twat With the Truth", but that's just the cunt in me. Anyheaux, if we gave every man who lied to us our cookies, we'd have more miles on us than an '84 Cutlass Supreme.  We (women and some men) have experienced our share of being lied to just for the sole purpose of getting our pannies. My point here is, we probably would be more giving if the men were a little bit more honest.
What is so hard about about speaking honestly to someone, in this case, who is not officially "yours"? Say you are just casual or maybe even dating, but the thought of sex is definitely in the air. You are not obligated to this person, so why lie?  Most of my experience is that men believe that if you don't ask him a specific question or a question at all, if they don't tell you, they are not lying. Peep the scenario:

Me: You have a girlfriend?

He: No.

Me: Are you dating anyone.

He: You.

This would seem to be a straight to the point convo, right? Uh uh. He failed to say that he was trying things out with a past "light switch" ex. Or that he was engaged, or married, or dating someone other than you. But since you didnt ask the specific "Are you married?" or another detailed question, he didn't answer accordingly. "They are only answering the questions you asked." BSTFUH. What part of the game is that? An honest man is a rare commodity, and many women may find your candid truth attractive. And ladies, you really wanna know how he feels? Truth Serum is a biatch.

In my opinion, we would be more willing to have sex with someone who we had trust in, despite a situation. Being lied to is being mislead. If you lied to me about where you ate dinner, who's to say you haven't lied to me about your who you slanging "d" to on a regular? Give me the opportunity to decide if I want to further the relationship after you told me the truth. After all, it is you in the wrong.  

By the way, there is no vice-versa on this subject for men, y'all are willing to beat our back in even when we are lying to you.

Riding Shot Gun in the Pussy Wagon

If you're not in the Lady GaGa Stan Van, bi***, you lost. Gaga and Honey Bey (yass) premiered the 10 minute long "Telephone" vid last nite on E. I be damned. These hoes are HOT. Just check the pix and commentary from Your Girlfriend's Girlfriend and her friends...

The Coke can rollers, leather stud jacket and the bikini under? I'm getting "Who's That Girl" fever.

*punches the air like Lady GaGa*

Honey Bey (yass) was giving me straight H-Town Raunch. How do I breeve?

GaGa and Honey Bey makes me wanna be a better, badder Biatch.

I wanna ride in the Pussy Wagon. Like, I wanna ride bitch. In the middle of GaGa and Honey Bey.

Do you see what these Biatches brang to the table?