Today is one of those days where everyone is on my Shit List. I can't seem to think how the people that I love and support have such a hard time reciprocating that gesture. I am by far a selfish person with my wealth. My wealth being my finances, materialistics, creativity, thoughts, love, or anything positive that I possess greater than others. When I help others, it's because I want to. And for what I reap, it's an immeasurable blessing and benefit. However, I have constantly been shitted on in the past and in the present, and I am about sick of it.
I wrote a blog months ago about supporting your peers. I generally want everyone to win, especially the underdogs. I have supported numerous bull shit business ventures by people because I love when someone is ambitious. Then ambition turns to greed, I immediately want to renege my support. When you have your heart and mind set on something to improve your and others lives, and when the money is coming in like you want, you want to jump into something else that requires more support from me. You trying to wear too many hats and it aint gon' work. These are Jacks of all Trades and Masters of None. Genuine support is hard to come by, and I would appreciate that if I support you, you do the same for me. I have passed so many ideas on to others and have not been properly thanked (support) for. Not to mention, I have discussed my own personal ideas to others to have them SHITTED on and then STOLEN. From now on, I will NOT discuss anything in the future to anyone, nor will I give up my "connect" to anyone. You need something? You go through me or find your own way out. It seems as if that's what I have to do now.
I hate asking for favors anyway. People will say anything and with me it's unnecessary. You can't do somethiing to help me, say that. Don't have me waiting in the dust because you said you can get something done. I can google shit if I wanted, but since you said (without me asking), that you can have it done, and you can't give me results. Just say no. Its okay to reply to my email, with a "No, I am sorry." or "Bitch, I don't work for free!" I totally GET IT. I believe in principle. It can be a favor for a favor, it can be purchased, whatever, I get it. What you don't get is that you can lose out on the biggest blessing by not wanting to help someone else. It doesn't hurt to help- FOR FREE. The sad part is that certain people in my life who deserve what I can offer may not get because I will be extremely selective on what and who I chose to help. Sprinkling Glitter (offering support and motivation) to someone every damn day is starting to be the downfall of my life. I am giving you want I can give to myself. I give you a fucking great idea and there you go. What do I have left for myself? Tears.
There are so many people out there that I don't even know personally or have even met, that send me more motivation than the people I "know". And to those wonderful people, you can get have all of my glitter. As for the others, I can be the "go-to" person for your benefit, but I can't ask you for shit? Seriously, tho? Please evaluate your life. Better yet, let me evaluate mine.
Now that felt good.